Nikki Finke assumes the rest of America is as sleepy as she is
LA Weekly’s Nikki Finke writes a blog, Deadline Hollywood Daily, that is renowned in some circles for its catty gossip and bafflingly off-the-mark observations. I’m a little late to the Nikki-bashing party, but I was so struck by her lead sentence in today’s post-Emmys item that I had to share. She writes:
It doesn’t surprise me that last night’s Emmys ratings fell to a record low, since I fell asleep right after Ray Romano’s monologue and missed the broadcast entirely.
What does this mean? Does she think the show’s ratings are based entirely on whether she watched it, and since she fell asleep, well, obviously the ratings would have to be low? Does she think her inability to stay awake past 8:15 on a school night reflects on a general trend of narcolepsy among TV viewers? What? What, I ask you?
OK, OK, the point she’s trying to make is that the show was boring — so boring, it put her to sleep, haw haw! Which would be an excellent derogatory comment to make, if she were a 10th-grade English student talking about “The Grapes of Wrath.” Grown-ups — or professional entertainment writers, at least — should understand the weakness of the “it put me to sleep” argument. Namely: You fall asleep because you’re tired, not because something is boring. Ask a doctor. Or just think about it logically. If your body doesn’t need sleep, you’re not going to doze off, no matter how boring something is. Saying that you fell asleep during something says NOTHING about the quality of the program. You must just as well say “That movie made my feet hurt” or “The Emmys gave me gas.”
Nikki’s point about the Emmys being dull is valid, but she sure expressed it in a dumb way.
September 17th, 2007 at 2:22 pm
I’d probably write the same way if I had a name as ridiculous as hers. Seriously, how many K’s do you need?
September 17th, 2007 at 2:41 pm
A sufficiently stimulating event will keep you awake even if you are tired, so she’s not totally off the mark there. She should have just been more precise. I usually watch movies pretty late, so I’m usually tired when I watch a movie. However, I only ever fall asleep during a movie if I find it completely uninteresting.
September 17th, 2007 at 6:54 pm
The Emmys DID give me gas.
September 17th, 2007 at 7:36 pm
I can definitely see what she was attempting to say, but the way that she worded it really bugs me too.
Whenever I am going to take a nap, I always pop in Arrested Development or the Office DVDs, watch for about 10 minutes or so, and then fall asleep. This doesn’t mean they are dull programs at all.
September 18th, 2007 at 5:28 am
The emmy’s gave me penguins. Who do I complain to?
September 18th, 2007 at 9:21 am
I’ve been wondering what happened to Jackie Harvey. Apparently he became a woman and got a job working for LA Weekly.
September 18th, 2007 at 10:59 am
I think “The Emmys gave me gas” will be my new motto. When people say “Hi” or “How’s it going?” to me at work, I will now reply, “The Emmys gave me gas” and see how many people are actually paying attention to what I say in response.
September 18th, 2007 at 8:48 pm
As a person well over halfway to earning my M.D. degree, I am still dangerously under-qualified to argue with Eric’s premise. However, I would like to say that Faulkner invariably put me to sleep within one paragraph when reading it as a senior in high school. I’ve never had that problem with any other book (even those read during the same time period as the Faulkner). I have to conclude that when something is tremendously boring and incomprehensible, it has a much greater soporific effect than other similar and unboring material.
September 18th, 2007 at 8:53 pm
Marc: It sounds like what you can conclude is that boring *books* might put people to sleep, not boring *things* in general.
September 20th, 2007 at 10:31 am
It is my hypothesis that people fall asleep when their heart rate is allowed to slow below a certain rate. Watching suspenseful programing or doing something requiring any movement generally keeps people awake, even if they’re a little tired. That said, I disagree with Matt. If you’re very tired, you can fall asleep during almost any activity or program. I fell asleep during Cirque du Soleil: Mystere, despite it being one of the most amazing things I’ve ever seen. Seriously, go see it, but not when you’ve been awake for more than 24 hours.
September 20th, 2007 at 2:06 pm
Sure, if you’re sufficiently exhausted, nothing is going to keep you awake. But if you are merely the kind of tired that I am at midnight on a typical day — could sleep, but not overwhelmingly compelled to — a boring movie allows sleep to occur while an interesting one does not.