Comments on: Eric’s Bad Movies: ‘Speed 2: Cruise Control’ (1997)

By: KimjustKim

KimjustKim — Mon, 02 Jun 2008 20:52:30 +0000

“Put me on a bus that’s been rigged to explode if it drops below 55 mph once, shame on you. Put me on a bus that’s been rigged to explode if it drops below 55 mph twice, shame on me.”

This made me laugh so hard I couldn’t even finish reading it out loud to the hublet. He had to lean over and read it to himself (which I hate). Then, today at the doctor’s office, it popped into my head and I sat there shaking with barely controlled silent laughter while the doctor finished making notes about our visit. Finally, he turned and cracked a joke which allowed me to let out my guffaws. I hope he didn’t wonder why I was so enthusiastic about his not very funny joke.

Also? The drywall bit. Comic gold.

By: Rob D.

Rob D. — Sat, 31 May 2008 10:40:12 +0000

That sounded like a “C” review. Just messing with you. Funny review Eric. With this question: OK, it’s a sequel to Speed, only without Keanu Reeves… …….I think the studio should have answered- now wait that sounds very intriguing.

By: Slipshod

Slipshod — Fri, 30 May 2008 21:21:06 +0000

My favorite part was when Annie had to free her fellow passengers from a locked room, and had no problem finding a chainsaw to cut open the door. I know that on most of the cruises I’ve taken, chainsaws were always conveniently accessible.

And then you have the part where Jason Patrick jumped off the back of the ship and then climbed back aboard when he didn’t catch Dafoe. Rather remarkable, considering that:

1) The ship was going 19 mph, about 4x as fast as an olympic swimmer.
2) The passengers supposedly couldn’t jump off the ship because the propellers would suck them in.

By: Clumpy

Clumpy — Fri, 30 May 2008 02:27:50 +0000

Oops - not “online.” On TV.

By: Clumpy

Clumpy — Fri, 30 May 2008 02:27:30 +0000

I saw part of this online. Willem DaFoe was putting leeches or something on his eyebrows. I didn’t understand it in the slightest.

By: rykoch

rykoch — Thu, 29 May 2008 20:06:00 +0000

I’m sitting at a small internet cafe in Brussels reading this review and laughing out loud and all these Belgians are flashing me dirty looks. Good job, Eric.

By: B

Thu, 29 May 2008 19:29:05 +0000

The movie does have one thing going for it, it inspired one of my favorite Milhouse lines, when Otto is driving the school bus really fast: “It’s like speed 2, but on a bus.”

By: Blue

Blue — Thu, 29 May 2008 18:26:53 +0000

I think this is the best (worst?) one yet. I love how you even got my favorite part to hate - where the navigator or whoever is calling out the speed of the ship. Five……..knots!!!!!!!!!