Ben's newest stupid obession: Feng Shui, a trendy Chinese philosophy that he picks up in a book: "Feng Shui the Fun Way." It mostly involves rearranging furniture ("I wanted the toaster and the pots and pans to be more relatable to the refrigerator"). Turns out Laura's into the same thing, and has done her apartment the same way; of course, if Ben were to come see the apartment, "it would upset my tranquility." Ben buys wind chimes, a new table, a fountain ("a urinal," Katz calls it), and all kinds of stuff. Katz discusses it with Stan and Julie, and Stan brings up tantric sex, wherein through meditation and stuff, you can "do it over long stretches of time. Sleep is involved, and maybe a sandwich." (By the way, rock singer Sting is supposed to be adept at tantric sex, as referenced in the Barenaked Ladies song "One Week": "Like Harrison Ford, I'm getting frantic/Like Sting, I'm tantric...." True story!) Ben eventually is driven insane by the stupid wind chimes.

• Tom Kenney: Bridal registry is "creepy" to him; basically your way of saying, "We love you, we want you to come to our wedding and celebrate our special day, but we don't trust your crappy taste"; wife is worried about the cat killing the baby; he doesn't want a second cat, because then the cat has an evil henchman; enjoyed the "cape phase" he went through as a child (and a teen-ager); broke both his arms and realized why people get married -- "Most roommates won't go there," he says, but his wife was willing to wipe for him; doesn't belong in this century; in the last century the worst thing you could say to someone was "Good day, sir!"
• Harry Shearer: Once saw Koppleman & Katz (episode (PUTLINK) 305) perform; doesn't say much, but makes reference to two books Katz has supposedly written: "Learning to Tie Your Inner Shoe," and "The Me No One Knows." They agree that reverse transferrence is not the same as "I'm rubber, you're glue."