The Covenant
Movie Review
"The Covenant"
Review by Eric D. Snider
Grade: D
Rating: PG-13
Released: Friday, September 8, 2006
Directed by:
Cast:
There must be a lot of embarrassment in the Screen Gems offices this week. They had this schlocky direct-to-video movie "The Covenant" waiting to be shipped out to America's Wal-Marts and Best Buys, and then somehow it accidentally got released into movie theaters! Into actual cinemas where actual movies are being shown! Whoops!
"The Covenant" is the story of four identical-looking swimsuit models who also happen to be students at an upper-crust Massachusetts prep school, who also happen to be witches. The first-born son of every generation in their four families starts to experience magic at age 13, with the full range of abilities coming into force on their 18th birthdays. But to avoid persecution (Massachusetts has a checkered past when it comes to witches), the boys' ancestors, the founding fathers of the town of Ipswich, made a pact centuries ago to keep their powers a secret.
The chief lad among these four is Caleb (Steven Strait), a good kid who eschews the school's dormitory so he can live at home and take care of his alcoholic mom (Wendy Crewson). (The dorm, rather improbably, is co-ed, so Caleb is really making a sacrifice here.) His wingman is Pogue (Taylor Kitsch). Reid (Toby Hemingway) is distinguished from the others by being the only blond and by being rebellious against the no-magic-in-public rule. Tyler (Chace Crawford) is a character who serves no purpose in the film whatsoever.
They're all decent kids, more or less, paragons of society, the top guys on the school swim team, call each other "bro" a lot and do that thing where they bump their fists together instead of shaking hands. (My movement to refer to the knuckle-bump as "fisting" has not caught on.) But odd, magic-related things start happening, including the appearance of horrific apparitions. Someone is using his witchcraft without authorization. Who could it be?
I'm not spilling any secrets here, but MAYBE it's the new kid who just transferred in, Chase (Sebastian Stan). He is ALSO a good-looking swimmer with an air of mystery about him, and he has been trying to integrate himself into the guys' inner circle. One of his methods is to hit on Pogue's girlfriend Kate (Jessica Lucas), which seems counterproductive, but whatever. He's not a suspect yet, but he's definitely a person of interest.
Oh, and there's also a new girl, Sarah (Laura Ramsey), for whom Caleb has he hots. She is the focus of many of the strange occurrences, suggesting whoever's using magic has his eye on her, too.
The film, written by direct-to-video veteran J.S. Cardone and directed by the famously craptacular Renny Harlin ("Cutthroat Island," "Cliffhanger"), actually has some cool mythology in it. The idea of magic being addictive -- the kids refer to it as "using," the way other people talk about drugs -- is intriguing, as is the notion that over-use of witchcraft will cause you to age prematurely.
But of course since this is a PG-13 movie aimed at teenagers, anything resembling thought, depth or creativity must be covered with a thick veneer of Gen Y-friendly pap. Everyone's gorgeous and buff and in a state of undress as often as possible, the soundtrack blares grungy rock tunes, the dialogue and acting are shallow. If the movie were TOO supernatural, it would become geeky and therefore less marketable. You have to keep things relatively normal to attract the 16-year-old girls and the boys who date them.
Also worth noting is the film's climactic battle, which is a letdown. After all this talk of the four sons of Ipswich sticking together as a team, the climax involves ... one of them. A second is out of commission, and three and four are just, um, not there. Like, they're at a party or something. Why make a film about a coven of four Harry Potters if your story is really only about one of them? Ah, because four Abercrombie & Witch models look better on the poster than just one.
Grade: D
Rated PG-13, some locker room nudity, moderate profanity, a little violence
1 hr., 37 min.
Copyright © Eric D. Snider.
This work may not be transmitted via the Internet, nor reproduced in any other way, without written consent from Eric D. Snider.
This item has 45 comments
November 13, 2006 at 6:32 pm
You know, it might help if you actually did some research on witchcraft. Although you may have a good point about a slight drug refrence, energy is in no way super natural. here's a quick run down for you. frist of all they are real. Second there is some truth to the explaination that Caleb gives about when and how you experance the power. for most it starts a pubrity. As far as it being addictive that depends on how the power is used and when. Now about your little remark about the sons of ipswich not sticking together. If you watched the movie closely you would have figured out that they are high school kids and were going to prom. look the general is not always on the field fighting with his men. Sometimes we have to confront a threat on our own. Being aquanted with theatre life myself I thought the movie was more realistic then the craft. Do any of you ever say anything good about a film that chalenges you to form a differnt persective on the way movies are done. I'm sure you didn't say that the maxrix seemed too supernatural and unreal. or is it because you still can't get the image of a hag out of your head?
November 15, 2006 at 8:59 am
Fascinating, Ryan, but what is a pubrity and how exactly does the power start one?
January 4, 2007 at 6:05 pm
Thanks Eric, I had more fun reading the review than watching the film..hahaha. SO darn right, keep up the good work. Oh, and Ryan, what are you talking about?? The movie isn't deep at all, it's as shallow as it can get.
January 7, 2007 at 12:36 pm
"The idea of magic being addictive -- the kids refer to it as "using," the way other people talk about drugs -- is intriguing"
It'd probably be more intriguing if it were original. Didn't Joss Whedon have the exact same plot in season 6 of Buffy?
January 8, 2007 at 2:15 pm
the covenant rocks ass man I love tyler,caleb,pogue,reid so much
but I'm only taking about tyler and caleb,but pogue and reid are good, but only is tyler,caleb hot ,sexy,sweet, cute,funny.
January 9, 2007 at 4:26 pm
I think the movie was good. There should be more movies like this for teens to watch than gang fighting, drug using and nudity filled films. There has been crticism about Renny Halin's history research when in fact you can't use some non-fictional names associated with the salem witch trials when one family was compensated in the early 1700's for thier suffering from the trials. Some original families are still sensitive I am sure. As for the acting, you can only be as good as your script and you have to start somewhere. The constant serial killer motif is getting old. Bringing more and more movies back from the 70's and early 80's just goes to show that horror/thriller themes can run its course. Stephen King had a flop with Maximum Overdrive. Give it a rest. I hope there is a second.
January 9, 2007 at 4:28 pm
By the way, the biggest waste of my money EVER on a movie was The Blair Witch Project!
January 10, 2007 at 2:35 pm
I loved the movie I've watched it a million times and it's so cool. I loved the special effects espesialy the eyes.The music was cool. My opinion THE GREATEST MOVIE EVER!
P.S.
Toby Hemingway has a cute butt.
January 16, 2007 at 2:50 pm
OK so the movie plot was lackin but who cares when the guys are fit and the birds are cute? im mean for teens its all about that anyway beats any cheesy teen movies i've seen lately, so yeh i like it,
January 20, 2007 at 6:05 pm
i thought the movie was really good but even more toby was the hottest
January 27, 2007 at 6:37 pm
I really liked this film. It was lacking some things. But the actors did a fabulas job. And *pheew those guys are fine! (cough, Reid, cough, Tyler,) So I hope theres a sequel!
-Patti
January 29, 2007 at 10:09 am
I'm new to reading these movies reviews, but I wish I would have read this before I actually wasted my life to go see this movie. I was so excited to see this movie before actually watching it. The fight scence was such a huge let down. Seems to me there is going to be the Covenant 2. If so, let's pray it's WAY better than the first one.
February 11, 2007 at 2:04 pm
yea i dunno y some of u are totally shunning this movie, i thought it was kick [bottom]!, there better be a fricken sequal.
February 16, 2007 at 8:16 pm
Sometimes, it's nice to see something that is purely entertaining - something that requires very little brain power. Movies are a form of escapism, and that's all this movie was.
I'm not 16 years old, I'm not a girl but I still enjoyed it. The old saying goes "Expectation is the mother of all disappointment" - if you were expecting anything other than a shallow teen supernatural thriller, then you're an idiot. All these people crying about wasting your money - wake up to yourself. From the synopsis and preview, its plain to see what this movie was - brainless, fun escapism.
February 20, 2007 at 12:46 pm
the craft = the covenant..
wait..isnt a covenant a band of FEMALE witchez?
February 24, 2007 at 10:51 am
I think the covenant is an awesome movie! The music is pretty cool! And on top of every thing Toby Hemingway is in it and he is smoking HOT! love him! xxxx
March 3, 2007 at 1:50 pm
i loved the movie i think it's awesome. I especially love steven strait in the covenant. i looks so great and he's amazingly attractive. i would love to meet him some day to just hang out and get to know him a little bit.
March 19, 2007 at 8:41 am
this movie was crap, ive seen cardboard with better skills. but seriously, like, all you like kids out there who like, think this movie was good your like, stupid...seriously. ok now i like, gotta go party cuz like, thats what ignorant morons who liked the convenant do! but seriously if you liked this movie, you mst love mtv also. i swear i wanted to like like this, but im not an empty headed consumer who just buys into anything feed to me. ( i took it from the net haha!)
March 27, 2007 at 10:28 pm
hey toby if you have any free time e-mail me back i ned to talk to you about something really important! by the way i really liked your movie. my life sucks write now and i need someone to talk to about it. i would tal to my friends about it but they wouldn't understand.
April 17, 2007 at 8:45 am
oh my god!! toby hemingway is so hot!!! i hope that there will still be covenant 2.. and more reid garwin please.. smokin hot, cute butt, bad boy.. i luv you redi garwin!!!wwwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
April 23, 2007 at 10:50 pm
Ok!well first im gunna say this was a terrific movie, i mean the actors were perfect for the roles the acting was brilliant...and for the people who are bashing the movie, im just going to say who in this owlrd looks at plot dialogue and all this crap your talking about!, well i can tell you, NOBODY because most normal people just sit back and enjoy the movie and just have fun with it, and not just LOOK for things to bash on it about! well i think ive made my point so if there is a sequel, remember this!!!
April 24, 2007 at 7:11 am
You know a film is AWFUL when it's primary defender [Ryan ladies & gents] has such an inability to spell correctly, even the most simple of words, it makes the whole situation so much more amusing.
explaination, pubrity, experance - You must be a yank for that jack you were shooting out, as well as about 15 and VERY under schooled. If americanese is your second language, I apologise profusely. Loser
Oh, wank film also.
April 24, 2007 at 11:15 am
my god i **LOVE** this movie...i realy hope they come out with a 2nd one...i mean come on 5 realy hot guys in one movie....but also for the witch craft freaks like me i just hope that they come together and make a number 2.......
April 26, 2007 at 11:10 am
omg!!!!!! I completely luved this movie. People that are bashing, you can just shove it!!!!!!!! this movie was just brilliant. Along with the actors. did you take a look at Steven he is smoking hot. i have probably watched this movie like a billion times and it never gets old. I hope there is a sequal. I can guarntee all of my friends and i will watch it.
May 1, 2007 at 7:05 am
I watch this movie with a girl friends of mine. We as agreed the actors were a little fake and redicutes but like another person metioned movies are a way to excape the pressures of life and everything with it. I went into this movie expecting another harry potter look alike movie but was plesentaly surprised by the original story ideas, i really do hope there is a sequal, because i think that this story line sufurred so that the sequel wont seem lame, like most sequels
p.s i agree with mlreich the blair witch project was a total waste of money
May 3, 2007 at 4:07 am
yum eyecandy yum! toby yummiest. sequel please!
June 16, 2007 at 7:29 am
Movie is awesome......will it be second part? does anybody knows?
July 25, 2007 at 5:32 am
I can't believe people are still posting after all this time. Do hot people really make the movie? Why sit through the terrible acting when you could just download a picture. I think Jessica Biel is hot, but I will never sit through another of her movies.
August 1, 2007 at 10:53 pm
This movie ROCKED!!! [: I dont know how any of you can say all that crap about it!!!! And the movie talked about real stuff, like the witch hunt, that was real! Yea maybe the powers aren't as real to some people, but it did have some real facts in there. There are many people out there that love witchcraft. Like me, i think that stuff is pretty cool! And so was this movie. When you left the movie i bet about 85% of people thought how awesome their life would be with those kind of powers and maybe about 45% of people got on their computer and was looking at spells and info about witchcraft after they saw that movie!!!
This movie rocked. And i cant wait for The Covenant 2!!! (yes there will be a sequel)
All the guys were GREAT actors(and pretty cute i must say,like chase he was hot and a great actor and hes also been in more movies before The Covenant!!)
But believe what you will.........
August 17, 2007 at 6:10 pm
wow i saw this movie and i loved it and im 19 and im not all omg hotties but the story was amazing .... you people who dont like are idiots
October 14, 2007 at 3:41 pm
This movie was a complete mess from start to finish. Literally. The whole opening sequence with the writing on screen, anyone with a half a brain knew the punch line, "until now.." was going to appear on-screen. Girls with little taste in movies will eat this up because of the model guys who couldn't act there way out of a bag. Everyone is better off watching Kung Pow! Enter The Fist. You'd have a much better time, because at least it was intentionally being mediocre.
October 20, 2007 at 12:58 pm
I lOVE THIS MOVIE!!!!!!!!!!!! CALEB is SOOOOOOO HOT!!!!!!!!!!!! I love his smile and his BUTT and beautiful EYES !!!!!!!! I wish I could met him and the other stars in the movie. But I hope they come out with a second one because it would probably be a best seller. The ohter movie was a Hit.Well anyways this was the best movioe in the World .IHOPE TO SEE A SECOND ONE SOON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
October 27, 2007 at 7:11 am
i loved the movie so much i can watch it all the time toby's (reid) is the best looking one there he is as hot as the sun. and he's got a cute butt. i have lots of pics of him all in my room and i got the sound track to the movie too coz i like the music. i really want to see toby one day coz i really want to talk to him face to face. i live in australia though. i really hope you make a second movie and if you do can you show more of toby instead of steven (caleb) coz toby's hot and caleb's not and did [spoiler] really die coz they didnt find his body.
P.S can you make another movie please everyone wants you to PLEASE PLEASE.
November 4, 2007 at 5:56 pm
i love love love this movie!!!! anybosy who doesnt has no taste in movies and can shove it! i watched the 1st time a couple of days ago and had 2 buy it the next day and it never gets old!! out of the 4 of them toby is definitely the hottest!!! its amazing how hot he is!!!! the other 3 were good looking 2 but they have nothing over toby!!! plz let there be a sequel!!!! i need more reid!!! hey tht rhymes.....
December 23, 2007 at 3:22 am
Every person here who stated a positive opinion toward the movie overall in addition to a reference to one or more of the actor's physical appearances is a blithering teenage idiot. Admit it: The movie was horrible. The acting was horrible. The dialogue was horrible. The plot-line was horrible. The movie's overall idea wasn't horrible but was way offset by the horribleness of every other aspect of the movie. I imagine the casting director walked into an Abercrombie & Fitch and asked some random people "Hey, can you act? Oh, nevermind, people these days don't care anymore about acting ability in movies. As long as they look screwable..."
Really, just about everyone here who commented who thought the movie was good (aside from comment 14) is deserving of this, but I'm going to pick on Lindsay because I can see her comment while writing this:
First of all, exclamation points (!) are typically used to give emphasis to a sentence. The problem is, if every sentence you write has one (or more) of these attached, then none of your sentences really have emphasis and instead it makes you sound frantic and childish.
Secondly, next time you post, please care to spell things correctly. Pressing the backspace key a couple times to fix a typing error is worth not sounding like an idiot. The layout and content of your post makes you seem very uneducated.
Nextly, capitalization. It's used to start sentences, and to classify proper nouns. Word's like Reid, Toby, and I should be capitalized.
Finally, using numbers for words is a very useful application while using mediums such as text messaging, where character limits are strict and low. Your comment here does not make you sound cool. It makes you sound lazy.
Sorry to only pick on you Lindsay, because a very large portion of the other people who left comments on this are also retards.
So please, all of you. Get off of my Internet!
December 30, 2007 at 1:02 pm
So does anyone know for sure if there will be a sequel. if there is i would really like to know cause i LOVE this movie and watch it about 2 times a day. and i have heard rumers about a 2ed movie but im not to sure. so if anyone knows please post and tell me
January 15, 2008 at 11:33 am
Listen, you dopes:
If you don't like a film you dont go & waste your time writing about how lame it was because that just proves that your life is so lame that you have nothing better to do.
We love this film , so if we're obssessed with it, its okay. But you **HATE** the frikin film so why waste your time?? And do you really think that your the only people can write insults on a keyborad? Because I too can press buttons on a keyboard but i'm the better person because I don't need to. I ACTUALLY HAVE A LIFE.
The only reason i came on this page was to see if there was a COVENANT 2. I'm not sure if there is but i really do hope so. It was an excellant film that was very well thought out especially the 'like a drug' idea.
I f you liked this film checkout >> Jumper a very good film =)
Any way to you film haters >> GET A LIFE!!
January 19, 2008 at 7:24 am
k basically this is a free message site people can poste what ever they want , i personially really liked this movie and would love to see if their is a 2nd one comming out any time soon, but if some people want to right nasty things so say that they didnt like the movie well thats their business and they can do as they please in ordere to get the good stuff you also have to hear the bad stuff. just because we like something some other person may hate it so .. just take the bad with the good
February 6, 2008 at 7:52 pm
Haven't seen the movie, but I imagine I would have drowned in the sheer amount of prepubescent hormones before the previews started.
Is it just me, or is internet English becoming a non-standardized language again, just like the good ol' 1500s? Can I spell any way I want as long as it works phonetically?
k thx bai
March 2, 2008 at 12:17 am
I'll first start of by admitting that I am under eighteen (over twelve, however) and a girl. That being said, I will definitely attest to how immature a lot of the comments on this movie are, and how most of them are made by females. Now, I am not opposed to saying that most of the leads were attractive--my preference was Strait and not the guy that played Toby--but a) that was the point of casting them, and b) I'm not about to obsess fangirlishly about it, because eyecandy is not what makes a movie. It for damn sure helps it sell, but it doesn't redeem a movie.
Now to an actual review: my opinions on this wavered generally from scene to scene. If I were to give a score to this, I'd say a six or seven out of ten. Yes, the dialogue was a bit shallow (see "Harry Potter can kiss my ass!"), and the visual powers were kind of limited (watching water balls being shot around does not a spectacular final battle sequence make), but I thought the overall premise was good.
I thought most--okay, some--of the actors did an excellent job portraying his or her character, namely the mother in the movie (regrettably, I forget the actress's name, but you know whom I mean), but I thought Steven Strait was good as well (note: I am not saying this because of his attractiveness; have that be known). Granted, there's only so much people can do with poor scripting, but I liked the range of emotions they could, generally, show.
Personally, the fourth guy--was Tyler his name?--was basically a waste of screen space. He had only a few lines, and when in an ensemble scene, I couldn't pick him out. Basically a waste of a couple dozen grand. Toby Hemingway was just weird, and I would say his finest moment was when Laura Ramsey was going back to her dorm and he just appeared. The guy who played Pogue did fairly well, and I thought it was a nice-ish moment when he was all "We're talking about Kate!" Sebastian Stan was okay for a villain, but slightly marred by his appearance. In my opinion, he should've been a bit taller, not had the boy-band spiky hair, and know that giving drawn out bad guy master plans never works. As mentioned above, Strait did a nice job of playing a meant-to-be multi-faceted character.
As for movie plot, it was okay. I liked the explanation of Putnam and the whole Sons of Ipswich deal, as well as how the power ages the user. I've never seen Buffy, so I don't know to what that reviewer was referring when mentioning it, so it was new to me. The special effects were slightly overused, but good. My favorite, I suppose, would be the exploding car scene. Liked the car itself, too.
I could probably go on in more detail, but I've already taken up a lot of space. I hope that I have redeemed the fact I am a teenage girl with my lesser amounts of "sheer prepubescent hormones" (quote courtesy of Andrew D.). And I most certainly agree with Devon. People need to learn how to spell and type correctly. Doesn't it take *longer* to go all the way up to the number "2" instead of just typing "two"? The squiggly lines under words when they're misspelled are not to make them look pretty. It seems as if people make an effort to make things more difficult. But I digress.
Anyway, that's about it. Liked the film, and it's great for an evening when you don't have much to do, but don't expect an Oscar winner.
To quote Andrew again and make a joke out of the generalized teenage population:
k thx bai
March 5, 2008 at 8:39 pm
Holy crap--a teenage girl who liked the movie and ISN'T a complete and utter moron!
See, kids--it really IS possible! Kudos to you, Laurel!
March 15, 2008 at 9:31 pm
This movie was sooo bad I mean I'm 15 and this movie did not appeal to me at all except of course for the complete hunks. The movie was not scary nor was it exciting. It was just plain stupid.Jeez I so glad I did not spend any money at the theater to see it. It came out on cable and for some reason they keep playing it. Oh and Ryan the first reviewer is a complete Moron and nerd probably. The blond guy in the movie reminded me of Draco Malfoy
April 11, 2008 at 6:19 pm
I thought that this movie was great! I mean how can you rate it with a D!!! I watched this movie like 3 times in 1 day!
April 12, 2008 at 12:30 am
While I agree that the movie wasn't all about life and learning lessons and such, it was still a pretty great film. Maybe it wasn't all you expected to be, but hey, you win some and you lose some.
Anyways, aside from the actors being severely sexy, the movie had a lot going for it. The plot was interesting and complex and intriguing, and it wasn't something just put together in a single night. There's history in it, and they explain some things where other movies would just leave you hanging.
The effects were pretty damn awesome, and everything looked real. The actors/actresses played their parts wonderfully, and no one half-a**ed it. And you gotta admit that the whole black eyes when casting magic thing was cool.
The movie, in all, was actually pretty cool, so long as you appreciate this kind of mystery/thriller/magic theme going on. If you're not interested in such things, then there was no point in watching it, right? Don't spurn and ridicule people for liking it. Just get on with your lives and let it be.
June 1, 2008 at 5:56 am
Tragically, the influx of teenage girls posting giddy, salivating comments about how "great" the movie is (while also taking care to mention how hottttt the actors are!!!!!!!) has forced me to close comments for this particular review. We encourage all teens everywhere, male and female, to come back when they are older and better able to express themselves in English.
Comments are closed.