Eric D. Snider

The Haunted Mansion

When Disney announced it would create films based on its theme park attractions, all sentient beings in the universe thought: Uh-oh. This is gonna suck.

The moronic "Country Bears" (2002) did nothing to allay our fears, but then the world was pleasantly surprised by "Pirates of the Caribbean" (2003), which was a fine swashbuckling adventure -- though, I hasten to add, one with little connection to the ride it was allegedly based on.

Now comes "The Haunted Mansion," which sticks close to its source material (dangerous idea) and which stars former celebrity Eddie Murphy (dangerous idea). But in the hands of talented director Rob Minkoff ("Stuart Little," "The Lion King") and new writer David Berenbaum ("Elf"), we get to be pleasantly surprised again. It starts slow, but once it gets going, it's a healthy dose of good, spooky family fun.

Murphy stars as Jim Evers, a real estate agent who, like most working fathers in movies, especially those played by Eddie Murphy, works too hard and neglects his family. His wife and business partner, Sara (Marsha Thomason), convinces him to take a weekend off with the kids, Megan (Aree Davis) and Michael (Marc John Jefferies), but he insists they stop for "20 minutes at the most" at a potential client's house.

The client is Gracey (Nathaniel Parker), and the listing is a dilapidated old mansion on the Louisiana bayou that has been in his family for generations. He wants a fresh start elsewhere, he says; too many memories ("ghosts," one might say) in the place. But before the Everses can leave, Gracey's ghastly butler Ramsley (Terence Stamp) announces that the rainstorm has made the roads impassable; they will have to stay the night.

From there it's a series of frights and set pieces as the family learns the history of the mansion and what they must do to lift its curse. The film deftly walks the line between funny and scary, never becoming so much of one that the audience can't also feel the other. In the category of funny, Jim and the kids encounter a quartet of busts that start out singing barbershop tunes but that soon begin turning whatever Jim says into a song. Shortly thereafter, we have the film's scariest sequence, set in a mausoleum full of living skeletons, in pursuit of Jim and Megan.

Kids will probably find most of it scary in a fun way, but you know your kids better than I do. (I haven't even met your kids.) Be advised that a few moments are fairly intense, even if they are lightened by the cast's wise-cracking and the film's general sense of amusement-park giddiness.

In all, it's neither as clever nor as campy as the attraction it's based on, but it's a suitable representation of its, er, spirit. I still hope they don't make "Spinning Teacups: The Movie," but if they do, maybe there's a chance it will be OK.

Grade: B-

Rated PG, some very mild profanity, some scary stuff

1 hr., 38 min.

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This item has 5 comments

  1. Laura says:

    I Think If Marsha Thomason Who Plays Sarah Evers I Think if Marsha Thomason Remembered That She Is Elizabeth And She Ended Up With Nathaniel parker Who plays Master Edward Gracey If She Remembered Who She was Because master Gracey Is Right She Is Elizabeth Because Master Gracey Is Her One True Love And Since She Reunited With Her One True Love And If She Ended Up With Her One True Love And Married Him Again Like She Did Before Ramsley Poisoned Her Then it Would Be A Fairytale Ending But It Didn't Sarah Ended Up With Eddy Murphey Who Plays Jim Evers And Elizabeth Didnt Marry Master Edward gracey They Both Reunited Together As one And They Both Went Up In heaven

  2. John Doe says:

    I tried to read that comment, but my brain refused. When did it become ok to capitalize every word and use no punctuation. All I got was "I think If Marsh Thomanson Who plays Sara Evers..and they both went up in heaven." My brain refused to read the rest.

  3. Katie says:

    I got as far as "I Think If Marsha Tomason Who Plays Sarah Evers..." and then it repeated itself, which, along with the strain of trying to read all capitals, caused my head to explode.

  4. Shirley says:

    All-caps girl(I'm guessing she's seven years old?) thinks that the realtor's wife should have married the rich ghost, I guess. Then she very helpfully told us how the movie *actually* ended, as if anyone would understand what she was talking about in the rest of her comment if they hadn't already seen the movie.

    I was so excited to see this when it came out, but then I found out it was gonna have Eddie Murphy in it, and...well...at least it didn't have any high expectations to live up to. I just think it's lame that the Pirates movies were scarier than the movie based on the ride with a specifically scary theme. (I know the robo-ghosts in the ride are lovable and sweet, but it still tries to be scary in parts.)

  5. ThatOneGal says:

    I saw this movie when I was nine (I know no one's going to be reading this, I just have to get it out), and I still have nightmares. The ghosts didn't scare me. The skeletons didn't scare me. I could deal with those 'creepy' elements. Oh no. The fact that the butler posioned the girl and the man hung himself haunts me to this day. I have seen countless movies that haunt me like that.

    If you are debating weather or not to let your child watch this movie, please don't let them. They WILL be scarred for life.

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