Bad 9-11 poetry: ‘Liberty Will Prevail,’ ‘Let Us Unite’
This is it, kids: The last edition of “Bad 9-11 Poetry.” I thought there would be another one, but I realized the other two poems I have were written by fourth-graders, and I’m not going to mock the post-9/11 literary efforts of schoolchildren. Of grown adults who should have known better, yes. Of kids, no.
So here are the final two. (I’m sure there was more bad poetry that came out of 9/11, but this is all that fell into my hands.) As before (check the previous entries in this category for background), these were submitted to a Utah newspaper in the days following Sept. 11, 2001, in the apparent hopes that they would be published, despite the fact that the paper had never published poetry before.
Liberty Will Prevail
by Michele H. Mirabile
[Handwritten note accompanying poem] Please consider this poem for publication, I think it effectively portrays what we as Americans are feeling right now. Thank you.
A mighty nation trembles,
besot with pain and grief;
Old Glory flies at half-mast –
a mighty nation weeps
Evil gloats as Freedom cries,
Godless men rejoice;
death and sorrow resonate,
revenge and war decry.
Peace is interrupted
by hate and jealousy;
terror visits Freedom’s shore,
her heart by pain, besieged.
We’ve defended many nations
that we might have liberty;
now cowards strive to wound us –
justice is our decree.
Blood has drenched our soil,
reaffirming our resolve;
we will never lose our spirit,
we will always rise above.
We are a nation undivided,
a land of liberty;
we will never lose our courage,
and God will always be.
Terror cannot conquer,
and hate will never reign;
we will rebuild our nation,
our flag will soar again.
America is stalwart,
and freedom will live on;
we’ll pledge allegiance to her,
remembering when she cried.
[Does that last stanza freak anybody else out? The whole poem has been rhyming (sort of), and then all of a sudden there's no rhyme. Not even a bad attempt at one, like with "resolve/above."]
* * * * *
Let Us Unite
by Vanessa Anne Wright
[Handwritten note accompanying poem] Note: I’m very sorry for the World trade center and for it’s people. I was at work when I heard the news. I feel that there is alot more to come. I would enjoy giving a poam to those who would want to be comforted.
Being united as one
with candle after candle.
come follow the light and let
us not fear to fight.
We heard on that fearful day
of our dear loved ones on that
Sorrowful flight.
Know it’s the time to stand as
a united nation to band from
this evil day.
March 1st, 2007 at 2:00 pm
I was gonna say reading this is like watching a train wreck, but I think it may be more like watching a plane crash.
Too soon?
March 1st, 2007 at 2:44 pm
I particularly enjoy the bad grammar and seemingly random capitalisation in the second one. It also has one of the most ‘original’ rhyming patterns I’ve ever seen.
Somehow picking on the fact that she’s written a ‘poam’ seems too harsh though…
March 1st, 2007 at 2:59 pm
I think I need a class in poetry. I can never seem to get the rhythms and rhyming schemes of a lot of these poems.
March 1st, 2007 at 3:59 pm
If you’re talking about the poems posted here, that’s virtually always because they’re so… well, bad.
March 2nd, 2007 at 9:11 am
I hate it when people write “alot” instead of “a lot”. It’s not a word people!! Trust me! If it was the dictionary would say “Alot: a word only stupid people use”.
March 2nd, 2007 at 12:31 pm
“We’ve defended many nations
that we might have liberty;”
Translation: we’ve started loads of wars so that we can be great.
March 8th, 2007 at 12:36 pm
Poem after alleged poem, nothing will ever come close to the poignant utterance “oh, day to flabbergast” from the Ballad of 9/11/01.
Love the Snide Remarks - I find myself laughing out loud at inappropriate times and places lately and it’s usually because of you. Thanks!
March 24th, 2007 at 2:57 pm
The rhythm in the first one actually isn’t that bad - rough in a few places, but still. It’s the sentiments that get me. It is possible to write a poem that expresses emotion without being sappy.
May 16th, 2008 at 8:58 am
I made it through the first line of the first poem thinking, “Hyperbole, but palatable, given the immediate shock and grief after the attacks”, but then the word “besot” put an end to that. The nation was DRUNK with pain and grief?! (Besot can also mean in a stupor, but I’m sure more people with at least a 10th grade English background would associate it with being hammered in a Shakespearean way.) So much for the first draft - even Roosevelt’s “Day of Infamy” speech was revised several times before being announced.