Miscellaneous

Miscellaneous

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Report from a Beleaguered Fantastic Fest

This year’s Fantastic Fest was packed with surprises, sexual deviancy, revenge, and sorrow, and that was just on Twitter. The movies were likewise full of intrigue — it was a good lineup, everything else aside (“How was the film festival, Mrs. Lincol...
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Reviews from Fantastic Fest 2017

We’ll talk about the behind-the-scenes turmoil at Fantastic Fest in another wordpile. In the meantime, here are reviews of some of the notable films that played there. They don’t have U.S. release dates yet (except as noted), but we’ll let you know w...
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What You Missed at the Overlook Film Festival

A certain breed of movie fan knows immediately why something called The Overlook Film Festival would be held at a place called the Timberline Lodge. The Timberline Lodge? In Oregon? Why, that’s the place that stood in for the fictional Overlook Hotel...
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My 2017 Sundance Film Festival Diary

Listen! Do you smell that? It's the Sundance Film Festival, back for another year of showcasing new independent films and terrorizing the helpless town of Park City, Utah. The mood is slightly muted this year, partly because there wasn't much pre-...
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Media Inventory: What I Watched and Read in 2016

This will not be on the midterm. This is not valuable information to anyone but me and those who stalk me (hi, Tim!). It's just a list of what I watched and read this year. MOVIES As it happens, I watched exactly 366 different movies this year, one...
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2016 films: miscellaneous data

Based on my own research. Additions welcome (@ me), will update accordingly.   Total wide releases: 160 Remakes, reboots, sequels, prequels, and franchises: 45 Based on novels: 19 Based on a true story (BOATS, as the kids say): 27...
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The Best and Worst Movies of 2016

It has not been a very good year, except for movies. And really, what else matters? THE BEST MOVIES OF 2016 1. "Arrival" I'm not particularly a science-fiction guy, but I know what I love, and I love "Arrival." In a year marked by tragedy ...
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Fantastic Fest 2016: An Exhaustive Report

One of my favorite weeks of the year is the one I spend at Austin's Alamo Drafthouse for Fantastic Fest, a genre celebration devoted to the kinds of movies that other festivals only play at midnight (if they program them at all). Sci-fi, horror, mart...
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Media Inventory: What I Watched and Read in 2015

This is for my own records. Nobody else read it! MOVIES I watched 349 movies in 2015. That's less than one a day, which is low for me. On the other hand, it's still 349 movies, which is a lot. It's almost 350. Here's how they broke down: - 1...
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The Best and Worst Movies of 2015

Another year has sped past us at the alarming rate of one day per day, 365 of them in a row, without cessation. Then, without warning, it stopped being one year and started being a different year. What do we do now? We look back on the movies we saw ...
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The Best and Worst Movies of 2014

2014 was a terrific year for movies -- and I say that without having seen several of the films that are appearing on others' top 10 lists, like "Selma," "Mr. Turner," "Ida," and "The Immigrant." (That last one has been on Netflix for months, so I hav...
2014

Media Inventory: What I Watched and Read in 2014

As always, you're not obligated to be interested in this. This is mostly for me. It's just a rundown of what I consumed in 2014, media-wise. Future generations may find it useful in reconstructing the collapse of civilization. MOVIES I watched ...
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Upcoming Movies with Internet-Inspired Titles Like ‘That Awkward Moment’

“That Awkward Moment” (in theaters Jan. 31) is an R-rated comedy starring Zac Efron, Michael B. Jordan, and Miles Teller as bros looking to score with hot ladies. The trailer indicates that one of the bros hooks up with another bro’s lady friend, lea...
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The Best and Worst Movies of 2013

There were some good movies in 2013. There were also some bad movies. In short, 2013 was like a lot of years: it had good things and bad things. Here are the top good things, in my estimation, according to me, based on my opinion. This list is final ...
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Media Inventory: What I Watched and Read in 2013

The rules are simple. I tell you, with an excruciating amount of exactness, what I watched and read this year, and you either read it because you are interested or you don’t because you aren’t. In other words, none of this will be on the midterm. ...
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2013 Film Titles: A Dramatic Reading

And now, two playlets in which the dialogue is composed entirely of 2013 movie titles (U.S. theatrical releases). Playlet 1 An atheist who believes global climate change will soon kill Mother Earth has a conversation with a Christian who believes g...
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The Pitch Meeting for ‘Last Vegas’

Thanks to the magic of high-tech surveillance equipment and a murky sense of ethics, we’re able to spy on the boardrooms of Hollywood and bring you the germs of ideas that lead to full-blown outbreaks of movies. Why, look, here’s an example now of th...
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We Asked a Telekinetic Teenage Girl with a Crazy Mother to Fact-Check ‘Carrie’

(Note: Our guest reviewer, 16-year-old Ashlei Mulligan of Fresno, Calif., is a junior in high school who has both telekinetic powers and an abusive, Bible-thumping mother. She has agreed to offer her expertise on the issues addressed in the film “Car...
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‘The Butler’ Box Office and Political Agendas

All human beings have biases and opinions. That includes the subsection of reporters, critics, and journalists who are human beings. It’s only natural to hope that your personal point of view is borne out by the facts, and to take a some pleasure in ...
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The 2013 Summer Movie Quiz!

Labor Day is upon us, which means we have survived another summer blockbuster season! But did it make an impression on us? After all the robots have been decommissioned and the zombies beheaded; after the last spider-bitten testicle has returned to i...
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The Steep Decline of Sketch Comedy from ‘Kentucky Fried Movie’ to ‘Movie 43’

Sketch comedy has been a staple of television ever since TV emerged, fully formed, from Milton Berle’s nurturing womb, but it’s never been a big hit in the movie world. Something about the format of brief, unrelated comic scenarios without an ongoing...
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The Pitch Meeting for ‘R.I.P.D.’

Time now for another round of a game we like to call “How Did That Ever Get Made, Who Thought It Was a Good Idea, and What Were They Thinking?” It’s an unwieldy title, but it gets right to the heart of the matter. To play HDTEGMWTIWAGIAWWTT, we plant...
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7 Pairs of Movies That Shared a Title Without Anyone Suing About It

There’s a kerfuffle going on right now between Harvey Weinstein and Warner Bros. over The Weinstein Company’s upcoming release “The Butler,” which shares its title with a 1916 Warner-owned short film. To Hollywood insiders, the battle over whether...
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The Pitch Meeting for ‘The Lone Ranger’

They say movies are like sausages: if you like them, you shouldn’t watch how they’re made, because it’s an ugly process that involves a lot of pigs’ anuses. But around here we disregard conventional wisdom and go behind the scenes of your favorite Ho...
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How ‘Man of Steel’ Is Better Than ‘Superman Returns’ (and Vice Versa)

Zack Snyder's "Man of Steel" arrives this week, with fans hoping it is more like Zack Snyder's "Dawn of the Dead" (i.e., pretty good) than Zack Snyder's "Sucker Punch" (i.e., the worst thing ever devised by man). What's already certain is that the Su...
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The Pitch Meeting for ‘Peeples’

Most of you aren’t important enough to have access to the plush, blood-stained offices where Hollywood executives make their decisions. Neither are we! But we are important enough to hire ex-CIA black-ops agents to infiltrate those offices and plant ...
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The Best and Worst Movies of 2012

I didn't fall in love with a lot of movies this year, but there were quite a few that I liked an awful lot. Strong, significant infatuations, maybe. The films that ended up in the bottom few spots on this list could have been swapped with a half-doze...
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Media Inventory: What I Watched and Read in 2012

The rules are simple. I tell you, with an excruciating amount of exactness, what I watched and read this year, and you either read it because you are interested or you don't because you aren't. In other words, none of this will be on the midterm. ...
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Is ‘The Hobbit’ OK for Kids? The Case For and Against

Even people who can’t read or don’t know what books are know that J. R. R. Tolkien’s novel “The Hobbit” is much lighter than his “Lord of the Rings” series. It’s shorter, more whimsical and more directly aimed at children. But does that mean the movi...
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Dear ‘Twilight’: Thank You For Ending

The “Twilight” movie franchise has been so successful that even people who are not in its target audience of teenage girls and sexually frustrated middle-aged women have been consumed by it, overwhelmed by it, unable to escape seeing evidence of it a...
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The Pitch Meeting for ‘The Oogieloves in the Big Balloon Adventure’

The question that people ask most frequently about the Hollywood film-making process is this: What were you thinking? This is followed closely by Why did you do that? and Who would want to see that? and, perhaps most importantly, What the hell were y...
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The 2012 Cannes Film Festival: A Recap

Bonjour, amigos! I was thrilled to attend the Cannes Film Festival for the first time this year, fulfilling a dream I’d had ever since I learned that you don’t pronounce the “s.” It’s not possible for any one human to see every movie playing at Canne...
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Live-Blogging the ‘Dark Knight Rises’ Trailer

"The Dark Knight Rises" won’t be in theaters until July 20, but Warner Bros. has helped satisfy our bat-appetites by releasing several hundred trailers. The latest one “dropped” (I think that is the slang term) a couple weeks ago. Here is our second-...
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10 Universal Truths We’ve Learned at the Movies

1. If there’s only one person with a British accent, that person is the villain. 2. Any plan deemed “just crazy enough to work” will, in fact, work. Any plan deemed “foolproof,” “simple,” or “perfect” will fail. 3. If someone goes over a very h...
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Things the Avengers Theoretically Would Not Assemble For

So this movie coming up, "The Avengers," you know what it’s about, right? It’s about some superheroes from other movies, plus a guy with a bow and arrow, who get together to fight villains. This is necessary because some villains are too powerful to ...
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What Household Items Will Become Movies After the Board Games Are Used Up?

The "Battleship" movie is coming May 18, and there’s nothing you can do about it. It’s out there, it can’t be reasoned with, etc. Everyone laughed when it was announced a couple years ago, then laughed some more when movie versions of Monopoly, Clue,...
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Pros and Cons of Seeing ‘The Phantom Menace’ in 3D

George Lucas announced in September 2010 that he would release 3D versions of all six "Star Wars" films, one a year, starting in 2012. In a rare instance of George Lucas doing exactly what he said he was going to do, "Episode I — The Phantom Menace" ...
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The Oxford Film Festival, and What It Says About Other Small Fests

Oh, sure, there’s Sundance and Cannes and Toronto and all those other “big” film festivals. Who needs ‘em?! Wait, that’s too harsh. We do need them. They’re great festivals. I’m sorry. Let me start again. Oh, sure, there’s Sundance and Cannes a...
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The Best and Worst Movies of 2011

Over the last few weeks I noticed several of my colleagues musing on Twitter about how difficult it was to choose a No. 1 film for 2011. They seemed to feel that there were a lot of movies that were very good, but few that were great, and nothing tha...
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Media Inventory: What I Watched and Read in 2011

This is the eighth year I've kept track of all the media I consumed. I like to keep track of things. As always, this may be of no interest to anyone but me, and you are welcome to skip it, or to read it and then send me angry emails for wasting your ...
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2011 Film Titles: A Dramatic Reading

And now, a playlet in which the dialogue is composed entirely of 2011 movie titles.   MAN: What's your number? WOMAN: I am number four. MAN: Arthur. WOMAN: Hanna. MAN: Monte Carlo. Real steel! WOMAN: Something borrowed? ...
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The Next 35 ‘Alvin and the Chipmunks’ Movie Sequel Titles

What we’ve already seen: "Alvin and the Chipmunks" "Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel" "Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chip-Wrecked" The next 35 titles: "Alvin and the Chipmunks Meet Frankenstein" "Alvin and the Chipmunks Take Manhattan" "Alvi...
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Logical Problems with a Horse That Goes to War

Sure, this new "War Horse" movie seems to have the makings of a champion. It’s based on a highly acclaimed stage play, it’s about a boy and a horse, and it’s directed by Steven Spielberg. That’s a potent combination. But we are skeptical! We have cer...
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The Pitch Meeting for ‘New Year’s Eve’

GARRY MARSHALL: Good afternoon, gentlemen! Thanks for seeing me! STUDIO EXEC #1: Are you kidding? You’re Garry Marshall, director of such classic films as "Pretty Woman," "Beaches," "Dear God," and "The Princess Diaries"! STUDIO EXEC #2: An...
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How the ‘Paranormal Activity’ Formula Would Work in Other Genres

We’ve survived two "Paranormal Activity" films and are about to let a third one haunt our dreams, so we’re pretty familiar with the formula by now: people use surveillance cameras and camcorders to document what’s happening in their homes; terror and...
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The Timeline for Winning Best Picture

Thousands of films have tried, but so far only 83 have succeeded in being named best picture of the year by the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences. This exclusive club includes quite a bit of diversity — everything from great films like "The...
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Things Nicolas Cage Could Do That Would Theoretically Still Shock Us

Few celebrities are as consistently entertaining as Nicolas Cage, an Oscar-winning actor who has forsaken serious drama in favor of behaving like a lunatic both on and off the screen. The list of bizarre things he has said and done in real life is al...
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2011 Fantastic Fest Review Round-up

When people ask what sort of movies are shown at Fantastic Fest, the easiest answer is that it’s any movie that can be described as “awesome.” In general terms, that means horror, sci-fi, and fantasy. In practice, Fantastic Fest also includes Asian m...
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The Pitch Meeting for ‘I Don’t Know How She Does It’

Perhaps you saw the trailer for "I Don’t Know How She Does It," recognized that it was based on a popular novel, and assumed the story of how it became a movie ended there. But no! There are always meetings, discussions, machinations, and schemes. Jo...
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A Fake Report from Our Fake Set Visit

As you know if you follow me on Twitter, I just got back from Tierra del Fuego, where I was visiting the amazing set of Brett Ratner’s upcoming remake of "Casablanca." You couldn’t be there with me, but don’t worry, I filled my suitcases with SCOOPS!...
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‘Glee 3D’ vs. ‘Final Destination 5’

The multiplex is confusing! Your typical neighborhood movie emporium has 16 screens, and on those screens are as many as five or six different movies. It is easy to become disoriented and choose the wrong film, especially when similar pictures are re...
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Investigating the Science of Body-Swap Movies

It’s time once again to put a movie trend under the microscope and examine it ... with Science! Our subject today is body-swap movies. Specifically: what is the deal with body-swap movies, scientifically speaking? The body-swap comedy is based on ...
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The Pitch Meeting for ‘The Smurfs’

STUDIO EXEC #1: Gentlemen, I was rummaging around in the Dumpster behind the studio offices yesterday, and guess what I found? STUDIO EXEC #2: Nick Nolte? STUDIO EXEC #1: No. STUDIO EXEC #3: Nick Nolte’s arm? STUDIO EXEC #1: No. ST...
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A Long Column About the Length of Movies

On the matter of movie length, Roger Ebert has summarized what every filmgoer knows intuitively: “No good movie is too long, and no bad movie is short enough.” Or as the old journalism saying goes, “A story should be like a woman’s skirt: long enough...
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‘Larry Crowne’ vs. ‘Monte Carlo’: How to Tell if You’re the Target Audience

While "Transformers: Dark of the Moon" is the movie that most people will be enjoying (well, watching) this weekend, Hollywood has a little thing called “counter-programming,” too, that enables you to see other new films. But there are two counter-pr...
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Unsettling Questions Raised by the Alternate Reality in ‘Cars’

John Lasseter, the chief nerd-wizard at Pixar, recently gave an interview to Box Office Magazine wherein he explained some of the mysteries surrounding the universe in which the "Cars" movies are set. We appreciate the effort, but we still have many ...
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Merchandising Opportunities That ‘Cars 2’ Missed

It’s astonishing to think that the combined marketing power of Disney AND Pixar could have missed any possible opportunity to cash in on "Cars 2." Yet our careful examination uncovers several potential merchandising tie-ins that Dis-Pix has failed to...
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Other Films in the ‘We Bought a…’ Series

Cameron Crowe’s next film, due in theaters later this year, is called "We Bought a Zoo." The title is not metaphorical: It is about a family that buys a defunct zoo and saves the animals from destruction. What’s more, it’s based on a true story. Some...
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Why the ‘Don’t Think About It!’ Argument is Dumb

Whenever there’s a dumb new movie like "Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen" or "Little Fockers: Revenge of Robert De Niro," and the people who write about movies for a living point out how terrible it is, the fans of those movies respond with the sa...
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Fixing ‘Gulliver’s Travels’

"Gulliver’s Travels" wasn’t the worst film of 2010. With "Little Fockers" and "Yogi Bear" in the running, it wasn’t even the worst film of the second half of December. But it was bad enough, and its release on DVD and Blu-ray gives us an opportunity ...
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Take a Tip from ‘The King’s Speech’: Edit Your Movie for a Better Rating!

You might think The Weinstein Company would be pleased with "The King’s Speech." It’s been a critical darling ever since it premiered last September, and a success with audiences since its theatrical release at Thanksgiving. To date, the film has gro...
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The 10 Commandments of Getting a Film into Sundance

And it came to pass that Redford did go up into a high mountain, and the Lord did speak to him, and did give unto him the 10 commandments of Sundance. And behold, Redford did proclaim these commandments throughout the land, that makers of independ...
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Logical Problems Presented by ‘Just Go With It’

In a rare lapse from the Happy Madison production company, it would seem that Adam Sandler’s latest work, "Just Go With It," is riddled with logical flaws. This is the impression we get from watching the trailer, anyway. Please spend 150 seconds of y...
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The Best and Worst Movies of 2010

In theory, it should be easy to figure out my 10 favorite movies of the year. I give them grades when I write the reviews. Come December, all I have to do is sort them from A to F and draw a line after the top 10, right? Simple math.
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Media Inventory: What I Watched in 2010

This account of my media intake is slightly streamlined compared to previous years. I've always done the "Media Inventory" mostly for my own amusement; this reflects how much amusement I found in it this time.
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A Scientific Breakdown of the Physical Comedy Presented in the ‘Yogi Bear’ Trailer

After seeing the trailer for the "Yogi Bear" movie (in theaters Dec. 17!), most people, once the weeping and despair have subsided, start to consider the scientific principles pertaining to the physical comedy contained therein. That is the subject w...
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The Pitch Meeting for ‘Justin Bieber: Never Say Never’

Though you’ve already marked Feb. 11, 2011, on your calendar as the day "Justin Bieber: Never Say Never" will be released, perhaps you’ll be interested in some behind-the-scenes details. How did such a film come to be? Join us as we eavesdrop on a me...
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Messages Left on Bill Murray’s Voice Mail

FACT: Bill Murray doesn’t have an agent or a publicist. Filmmakers who want to offer him a part in a movie must call him — if they can track down the phone number — and leave a voice mail. He’ll go for weeks at a time without listening to those messa...
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EXCLUSIVE: Script Pages from the ‘Alien’ Prequel Gay Sex Scene!

Last week word got around that an Australian website called What's Playing had seen the script for Ridley Scott's "Alien" prequel, and that it included a rather peculiar scene. Two human slaves, Fin and Karik, are terraforming under the command of so...
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Things That Could Theoretically Stop the Train from ‘Unstoppable’

"Unstoppable," the latest collaboration between director Tony Scott and actor Denzel Washington, invites scrutiny with its title. We know it’s about an out-of-control train filled with explosives that will destroy a city if it crashes. But “unstoppab...
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‘RED,’ As Written by David Mamet

One of the supporting roles in "RED" is played by Rebecca Pidgeon, who is married to David Mamet and primarily appears only in movies written and/or directed by him. When you see Rebecca Pidgeon in a film, you think David Mamet must be involved. As i...
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Fantastic Fest 2010 Mini-Reviews

Just about any major film festival will have a few selections that are controversially violent, graphic, or insane, or that address unserious topics like vampires and cannibals. These are often set aside in a “midnight madness” or “extreme” section, ...
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Top 10 Movies That I Am Thinking of Right Now

If you want to start a debate among movie fans, the easiest way is to ask, “What are the top 10 movies I’m thinking of right now?” Everyone’s going to have their own list of what movies I’m currently thinking of, and everyone’s going to defend that l...
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Explaining ‘Machete’ to Aliens Who Have Just Arrived from Outer Space

Welcome to Earth! Thank you for not killing us immediately. Ha ha, just a little joke there. We’ve made a lot of movies about what might happen if aliens came to visit us, and it usually doesn’t go well for us. Oh, you’ve seen some of our movies? ...
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Stallone-a-Thon: Daylight (1996)

In honor of Friday's release of "The Expendables," we're taking a week-long look at the action films of Sir Sylvester Stallone -- which is to say we're skipping his comedies. Out of respect. Title: "Daylight" Setting: A tunnel connecting Manhat...
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And Now We Imagine a Meeting Between Nicolas Cage and His Agent

AGENT: Hey, Nic, thanks for coming in. I — what the hell is that on your head? CAGE: It’s a bird, man! Have you seen that Photoshop on the Internet where they turned my hair into a bird? I thought it looked cool, so I had it done for real. AGEN...
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The Pitch Meeting for ‘Grown Ups’

Our spies have once again discovered raw, uncensored footage of a pitch meeting held in Los Angeles, the result of which was the movie "Grown Ups," which opens June 25. Our spies are strangely prolific when it comes to finding this sort of thing. ...
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Cinemaligion: ‘Dogma’

Kevin Smith nearly always adheres to the principle of "write what you know." That's why "Dogma," his controversial 1999 comedy, is brimming with Catholicism, skepticism, profanity, poop jokes, movie references, and Ben Affleck. If you were to cut Kev...
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The Pitch Meeting for ‘Killers’

It’s time once again to take you behind the scenes at the sausage factory, where the “sausage” is movies, and the “factory” is a studio executive’s conference room somewhere in Los Angeles, and the “pork” being ground into “sausage” is the hopes and ...
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Cinemaligion: ‘Contact’

Thirteen years ago, there was a big-budget summer blockbuster that did something rare: it entertained people AND made them think about important philosophical issues. Its repercussions continue to be felt today. That movie, of course, was "Beverly Hi...
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Five Product Ideas Better Than Bella Swan’s Engagement Ring

Remember how you read "Eclipse" and wished that you were a teenage girl named Bella so that a vampire named Edward would give you a beautiful engagement ring like the one described in the book? I have good news! The people at Infinite Jewelry Co. — w...
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Why Cutting Megan Fox from ‘Transformers 3’ Is a Mistake

Nikke Finke, the reclusive and possibly fictional scoopmeister behind Deadline Hollywood, is reporting that Megan Fox will not be in "Transformers 3." (CNN confirms it.) Paramount has passed on its option to hire her for the sequel, and Finke's sourc...
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Cinemaligion: ‘Monty Python’s Life of Brian’

When you're writing a column about how religion is portrayed in movies, "Monty Python's Life of Brian" seems like an obvious choice. It is, after all, the satiric story of an ordinary fellow who happened to be born on the same night as Jesus, in the ...
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2010 Tribeca Film Festival Report

Some film festivals seek to champion low-budget independent films. Then there’s Tribeca, where this year’s opening-night feature was "Shrek Forever After." In its 9th edition, Tribeca is still finding its identity, trying to strike a balance betwe...
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Cinemaligion: ‘The Blues Brothers’

If Jake and Elwood Blues taught us anything -- and I think you'll agree they taught us many things -- it's that you can be religiously devout and still have a good time. Now, "The Blues Brothers" is not a religious tract, and the Blues Brothers ar...
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‘Furry Vengeance’ and ‘A Nightmare on Elm Street’: How to Tell the Difference

Hollywood can be so confusing! Both "Furry Vengeance" and the new "Nightmare on Elm Street" are opening on the same day, April 30, and I can already see moviegoers buying tickets to one when they meant to buy tickets to the other. How can the average...
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There Is Going to Be a Marmaduke Movie, And You Can’t Stop It

When you get the newspaper every morning and look at the comics page, surely one of your first stops is Marmaduke. Whoops! I beg your pardon. Let me translate that sentence for readers under the age of 60. Many news websites used to print their...
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Cinemaligion: ‘Footloose’

Nothing will turn a conversation awkward faster than bringing up religion. So let's do that now! Then we can talk about politics! It's no exaggeration to say that the vast majority of people worldwide belong to one religion or another -- about 84 ...
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2010 SXSW Reports

They like to kick off the South by Southwest Film Festival with a kick-ass movie, so it’s fortunate that this year, someone actually made a movie called "Kick-Ass." If ever a movie was designed for the SXSW crowd — mostly young, male, and slightly g...
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The Kind of Movie That Neil Marshall’s ‘Centurion’ Is

Last night about 150 lucky South By Southwesterners were the first audience in the world to see "Centurion," the bloody new action flick written and directed by Neil Marshall ("The Descent," "Doomsday"). It was one of SXSW's famed "secret screenings,...
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The Pitch Meeting for ‘The Bounty Hunter’

When you saw the trailer for "The Bounty Hunter," your first thought was probably, “Why did the Oscars expand the Best Picture category to 10 nominees? They’re only gonna need one next year!!” But how does a movie this original and daring get made? W...
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Circumstances Under Which I Would Willingly Watch ‘Little Fockers’

The first question you have when faced with the reality of a second "Meet the Parents" sequel, called "Little Fockers," is “Why?” But the second question is “Why now?” It’s due in theaters this December, six years after "Meet the Fockers" and 10 year...
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What to Expect from a George Lucas Musical

Out of George Lucas‘ Death Star-like headquarters comes word that the "Star Wars" creator/ruiner is producing a computer-animated musical, to be directed by Kevin Munroe ("TMNT") and written by David Berenbaum ("Elf"). All anyone knows about the plot...
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My 2010 Sundance Film Festival Diary

Day 1 (Thursday, Jan. 21) Let us hie to Utah's icy climes and the 2010 Sundance Film Festival, held each January in the frozen, picturesque wasteland of Park City and founded by a friend of Paul Newman's named Robert Redford. This is one of the worl...
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The Best and Worst Movies of 2009

Choosing 10 films for my list this year was easy. The hard part was deciding which film should be No. 1. Was I prepared to declare any of these fine movies unequivocally the Best Movie of 2009? But on the other hand, did I want to wuss out and do a lame alphabetical list? The answer to both questions was no.
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Media Inventory: What I Watched and Read in 2009

This is a thing that I do. I keep track of all the movies, TV shows, and books I consume over the course of the year, then add them up and reflect upon them. Why would I post something like this, something that is clearly only of interest to me and n...
The-Italian-Job

How to Plan a Movie Robbery

If we’ve learned anything from watching movies, it’s that complicated robberies — of banks, casinos, millionaires’ mansions, the Library of Congress, whatever — succeed about 98 percent of the time. This is no doubt due to the meticulous planning tha...
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The Pitch Meeting for ‘Showgirls 2’

For some reason, a German man named Marc Vorlander is apparently making a sequel to the infamous 1995 laughingstock "Showgirls." Called "Showgirls: The Story of Hope," this chapter will focus on Hope, a minor character played by Rena Riffel in the or...
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Our Fake Interview with Rob Zombie

We were planning to interview Rob Zombie in conjunction with the upcoming sequel-to-a-remake "Halloween II," which he wrote and directed. But then some things piled up on our desks, and we lost track of time, and, well, you know how it goes. So inste...
dennis-quaid-interview-promo

Our Fake Interview with Dennis Quaid

Make no mistake — we could have interviewed Dennis Quaid if we wanted to. He’s practically on our speed-dial. But then we got to thinking about it, and we figured he’s probably doing a lot of interviews for "G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra," in which he ...
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