Eric D. Snider

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Tim Nasson: Still a crazy liar!

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If you know anything about me, you know that I LOVE CRAZY PEOPLE. They are the spice of life. They make dull things interesting.

One of the craziest people I’ve ever encountered is Tim Nasson, whose awkward, poorly syntaxed writings appear at Wild About Movies. I first wrote about him last year when I told you how he’d been misquoting people he interviewed. Then, this past summer, I talked about his new trend of pretending to have interviewed people he had not, in fact, interviewed. Then I had to tell you about some funny lies he told about me on his site, and then I figured, what the heck, I might as well publish the e-mail correspondence I had with him. Why should I be the only one who gets to enjoy his hilarious delusions?

And now I am honored to report that Tim Nasson has posted a comment on this very blog! In the last entry I mentioned, another reader was talking about problems he’d had unsubscribing from Nasson’s mailing list. This prompted Nasson himself to chime in and post this:

you are such a [swear word]
hope you get burned by the FBI for harassing Wild About Movies
We have records of not only your IP address the 30 times you registered for promos but also your physical address, which you inputted into our system, 30 times. GoDaddy, and everyone else you emailed laughed when we provided them with ALL of the information and think you’d be better off locked up in a loony bin with Eric D Snider.

Check out his www.alexa.com rating – his site’s, then www.wildaboutmovies.com Don’t think any movie studio has called him lately, asking to buy his site. Nuff said. Anyone who reads this site is obviously pathetic, like poor little, or rather should I say, poor ugly Eric. I should add that he emailed me wishing me to die of AIDS. I am not stupid enough to post anything about his site on my site because, as you know, there is no such thing as bad publicity, and publicizing his name or site in any way would give him free attention.

Now, here’s how you can tell Tim Nasson is more than just a jerk — he’s straight-up insane. People who are merely jerks will tell a lie or exaggerate something, but it’s usually based on an actual grain of truth.

Crazy people, on the other hand, just make stuff up.

Obviously, I never e-mailed Nasson wishing him to die of AIDS. The only germ of truth there is that I have e-mailed him. About other things. Non-AIDS-wishing things. I’ve never said anything nasty or personal to him, except for my repeated mentioning that he’s crazy, and I stand by that assessment. The fact that he would make up something so ridiculous and patently false is proof enough of that.

As long as we’re telling the truth about things, I figured you’d probably want to see the (apparently abandoned) Wild About Movies MySpace page. The highlight is down the left-hand column, under “Books,” where he gives what he says is the prologue to his “autobiographical novel.” You should read this, though be warned it has a bit of R-rated language and sexual dialogue. If it truly is autobiographical — and remember, he has posted this himself on his MySpace page — then his father was a religious zealot, his mother had previously had a set of stillborn twins, and Nasson was the consequence of an unwanted pregnancy. That sounds sad, but trust me, it’s not sad the way he describes it:

It all happened, began, to be exact, on the fifteenth night of September in the year 1970. Destiny was to blame for almost all of it. Perhaps that darn hooligan, destiny, was playing a sick and twisted joke on the lives of two pathetic, newly married strangers. Strangers I say, because their marriage was a rushed one. From their introduction to holy matrimony only four full moons went by.

Or this, near the end:

Whatever pains birth brought on would be made up a hundred fold in raising the child that was now on its way into a bright new world, Sherry thought to herself that day only a year ago. Until the doctor whispered to her that the baby he had delivered was born still. All seemed to have not been lost, though. There was another head soon squeezing out of the vagina. However, when the doctor slapped this babys bottom, it did not utter a sound. It, too, was not meant to suckle from his mothers swollen breasts.

Why would I want Nasson to die when he provides such a steady stream of hilarity while alive?

21 Responses to “Tim Nasson: Still a crazy liar!”

  1. Ben C. Says:

    I sure don’t want him to die. I’m torn though… I’m not sure I want him to get help either… If he got some help and wasn’t crazy anymore who would take up his torch and give us funny things to laugh at? Maybe if we had some sort of transition period between one crazy nut and another it would be ok if Mr. Nasson got some professional help.

  2. Andrew D Says:

    *faints*

  3. lilcis Says:

    “All seemed to have not been lost, though. There was another head soon squeezing out of the vagina.”

    Wow, what a poetic way to describe the miracle of childbirth.

  4. BeeDub Says:

    How does a man like Tim Nasson function in normal society? Is it really safe for him to walk around in public?

  5. Savvy Veteran Says:

    His MySpace page reads like a fake page that you (or someone else who has realized he is completely insane) created just to mock his existence. Sadly, this doesn’t seem to be the case. That has got to be one of the most disgusting yet strangely hilarious things I have ever read, and I believe that neither of these elements were intentional.

  6. Niall Says:

    lilcis – LMAO!

  7. Wombatty Says:

    Holy Crap! That’s a kind of crazy I’ve never had to deal with. Does he wear a foil hat? Because foil hats cure that kind of crazy, I bet.

    **Folding Foil into Hat**

  8. Thoughtful Observer Says:

    It was so terrible. His writing gives a whole new dimension to the horror that is purple prose. I also think it is interesting that his myspace page has only 23 friends. One would think that since everyone loves him so much, they would all love him on myspace. Makes one think….

  9. Karmacoma Says:

    Why would anyone want to read his autobiography?

  10. David Says:

    “Sherry did push and with that I exited the tunnel of love…”

    It’s like a combination of a 9-year-old trying to be profound, and really bad pornographic literature. Eric, the problem you’ve created for me now is that I cannot stop trawling through his site looking for more examples of his patented style of pure and unadulterated crazy.

  11. SLoweCSL Says:

    Wow, who is this guy? I read his stuff and I get images of Doc Brown from Back to the Future, but without the genius part.

  12. Jesse Harris Says:

    Are you sure this dude doesn’t operate under any aliases? He sounds exactly like a guy I had a run-in with last week.

  13. David Manning Says:

    I would love to introduce this guy to my 10th grade English teacher.

  14. BethAnn Says:

    I hereby resolve to use the phrase “that darn hooligan, destiny” at least once a day this week. THAT is comedy GOLD! If only this nutter butter knew how funny he was.

  15. Clumpy Says:

    He just reminds me of some character in a cartoon:

    “You can’t arrest me! I have superpowers and my mother is the queen!”

  16. ClobberGirl Says:

    I don’t think death by AIDS is a very good way to wish someone death anyways, since modern medicine has made it possible for someone to survive 30+ years after contracting HIV. Last time I asked one of my sexually promiscuous friends whether or not they even worried about contracting AIDS, they said no because they knew they’d still live for a good long time afterwards.

    Telling someone you wish them death by AIDS is basically like telling someone you wish them death by watching paint dry. Yawn.

    I read a Darwin Award nomination once about a man who crashed his truck into a septic tank, lost consciousness and drowned in the poo. That’s definitely how I would wish someone death if I were the death-wishing sort.

    Just sayin’.

    Oh yeah, and Tim Nasson is… well… I’m sure his mother’s vagina is flattered to have been granted such a spotlight.

  17. Ben C. Says:

    No one dies from AIDS anyway, right? They die from other diseases they contract, but their immune system is weakened by AIDS and they can’t fight it off. It’s just a catalyst, not the actual cause.

  18. Steve Says:

    Born in 1971, current age 31. MySpace didn’t even exist when he was 31.

  19. Angus McFarland Says:

    So I Google Tim Nasson and the first thing that came up is an interview with someone in “She’s The Man.” Beautiful start to my day! Two of my favorite controversies (courtesy of this site, thank you) collide.

    Also looked at his webpage, the “Contact Us” section. If I was as popular and powerful as he claims to be, I think I’d have more than an email address ending in gmail.com. Just my thoughts.

  20. SLoweCSL Says:

    Nope, the site is not abandoned. You have to read the Letters to the Editor section. Someone writes him about the movie, Transformers, and his response is so crass, I can’t visit the site again. I feel I have to take a shower afterwards.

  21. nate Says:

    just ignore my comments and do not publish…………………………
    but i for one do not want to get into a further hissy fit pissing contest with this person.

    Vote1: He is a bully, and sends out his merchandise quite late.
    You can quote that.

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