An epiphany at Starbucks
Sometimes I go to Starbucks and get a piece of coffee cake. Often they have two varieties, regular and Portland. I get the Portland kind, and every time I get it, I ask, “What makes it Portland-y?” And then I always answer my own question with a joke along the lines of, “Does it taste like hippies?” or “Is it made from vegetarians?” I try to keep it fresh by mentioning something different every time, just in case it’s the same cashier that I’ve made the joke with before. But the other day I realized that I’ve never actually listened to the answer, which means I still don’t actually know what the difference is between Portland coffee cake and regular coffee cake. So maybe instead of cracking jokes I should shut up and listen? Is that the lesson here? Was my dad was right all along?

September 2nd, 2008 at 12:02 pm
Portland coffee cake is made with Salmon.
September 2nd, 2008 at 1:10 pm
Portland coffee cake has weed in it.
September 2nd, 2008 at 1:22 pm
Portland coffee cake is the only thing Michael Moore eats.
September 2nd, 2008 at 1:38 pm
I think it just doesn’t have all those crumbly things on top…like it’s flat…minimalistic…clean.
September 2nd, 2008 at 1:41 pm
Portland coffee cake is baked on a hot stone in the sun so that no energy is wasted by using an oven.
September 2nd, 2008 at 2:14 pm
Have you ever actually gotten a sensible answer or do they just laugh at your wisecrack?
September 2nd, 2008 at 4:49 pm
The Potland variety is made of cement.
September 2nd, 2008 at 6:25 pm
Yes, your Dad is right.
September 4th, 2008 at 3:36 pm
Portland coffeecake is flown in from Maine. I will never tire of jokes confusing the two Portlands.