Ben thinks Katz is drinking too much ("Take the mask off for one minute"), which of course he is not. As usual, Ben goes way overboard, mentioning a TV program he plans to watch: "The Drinky Guy Who's Drunk All the Time, and His Name is My Dad" ("Drinky the Drunk Guy" is Katz's suggestion for a similar program). Ben calls Laura to check on his dad, and she tells him not to let his own hypochondria extend to his father. He attempts an intervention, guided by a pamphlet called "Why is Daddy Actin'Funny?" but it's a bad time for Katz, who is busy reading "The Foot Bridges of Madison County." So Ben vows to try the intervention at a more convenient time.

• Ray Romano: Glad his twin sons are identical, because it saves on photos; his mother is afraid she'll keep feeding the same one over and over; she marks one so she can tell them apart ("OK, Matthew has a scratch ... and he's a crybaby"); men can't hold the door open for other men; they can just give that little half-push ("I'm not gonna hold it, I'll get you started"); won't buy a greeting card if it says something that he could have said himself.
• Janeane Garofalo: Asked how to spell her last name, she says, "Like the animal"; after sex, acts like a bartender ("OK, people, wrap it up. You don't have to go home, but you can't stay here"); mocks people who marry their high school sweethearts (Katz: "I'm not disagreeing with you so much as I'm agreeing with what I said"); spends $1,800 a day on lattes; got mugged and lost her driver's license with the really good photo, as well as pride, sense of rhythm, and whimsical good nature; Katz gets all her personal info wrong and suggets possible memories for her to remember, none of which are accurate.