We go all the way back to 1974, the year of my nativity, for this week’s edition of Eric’s Bad Movies at Film.com: “Zardoz,” an infamous trainwreck starring Sean Connery, a creepy mustache, and a tiny pair of shorts. I’d never even heard of this thing until last year, when I first asked for suggestions for Eric’s Bad Movies and it came up several times. Last week’s call for new recommendations brought it to the surface again, and I could put it off no longer. It’s one of the few Eric’s Bad Movies that I wouldn’t actually discourage anyone from watching, because it’s just so weird. No amount of mocking and ridicule can accurately describe it.
Holdy Crap! That picture just scarred me for life!
So funny…oh so funny. “A god who’s pro-gun and anti-penis? “How soon can I be baptized?” asks Ann Coulter.” Except now I have this image of ann coulter and sean connery and it’s not so good.
I suspect that the picture does a good deal of describing the movie. It’s all I want/need to know.
Oh the sheer Irony of it all,
The AD on this page says…
“The World’s 50 Sexiest Men Over 50 See If Sean Connery Made The List”
After that photo of Sean Connery in his tiny…..Langot(Hindhi for Mankini)….he looks more like a Featured Paedophile…or at the very least a hero from a movie which goes something like “The Revenge of the ***** Queen of New Orleans” (ps, there actually was a xxx movie by than name which I saw Ages ago)…
Eric-Your funniest review till date-tops even that Electric Boogaboo stuff, and I think topping this one is going to be challenging……
oh btw can I sue u for causing damage to my health?
I just fell of my chair laughing…..
“Next thing we know, Zed is actually inside the stone head, hiding in a pile of grain. Then he shoots a guy who is also in the head, who plummets to his death. Then Zed is in a little village that is full of wonders he has never seen, including blouses, knit tops, and camisoles. All of this is eventually explained, sort of, but it’s the beginning of a disturbing trend in the film, which is that I frequently have no idea what is happening”
This must be the most random scene in the history of Cinema….LMAO!!!
btw dis Masterpiece is available on Amazon for $ 8…..jus ordering it….
Weird or not, I still want to know the ending.
I always figured Ann Coulter is pro-penis, seeing how she has one and everything.
Seriously, did you scrub yourself down w/bleach after watching S.C and his hairy chest for two hours???
Variety’s review of “Zardoz” is even funnier than Eric’s:
http://www.variety.com/review/VE1117796581.html?categoryid=31&cs=1&p=0
In the pantheon of funny things Eric has written, this could be the funniest. The mankini Connery is wearing is laugh-out-loud funny but I truly lost it after reading the Ann Colter line
(Sigh) I wish sports were this funny.
Thanks for the laugh, Eric. I can always count on you.
Boorman’s wife did the costume design.
Praise Zardoz and pass the brain bleach! I will never again think Sean Connery is sexy.
Amp: You really don’t want to know the ending. You want to know the middle, which really should have been the ending, but then it just keeps going. And going. And you start screaming ‘Please God Make it Stop!’
I liked another guy’s review that pointed out that Sean Connery is wearing hooker boots. Awesome. But Eric’s review was better overall.
I’m not certain that everyone other than Boorman would have had to be high. He would have just told them that it’s all way too deep for them, man, and if they don’t dig it then they’re just not with it. And then they’d pretend like they got how deep it was too, and try to convince others that it’s really deep as well. Kinda like how 2001 Space Odessy got so popular when in fact that was just one long drug-induced haze of…whatever the crap that was. Yeah, well I’m not falling for it, you SciFi psychopaths!
Hey, how about reviewing “Clash of the Titans”? Surely that deserves it now.
Eric, I agree with everything you say about the movie except that you don’t recommend it. In fact, I love this movie. There are times that it almost seems out of sequence, but remeber the era in which it was produced. I do not recommend the lifestyle. In fact, I would strongly discourage it. However, Zardoz brings some of that culture through. From the way that the Zardoz religion was begun (misunderstanding) to the life from human essence. It is the classic battle of peace and war. Although there can be no real comparison, at its center is the same kind of concepts that developed into “Planet of the Apes.”
This is simply a great movie to sit and watch and be mindless. (I think we need a little more mindless and a little less stupidity and there is a difference.)