Goodbye, dumb UVSC; hello just-as-dumb UVU

Earlier this month, a very sad thing happened: Utah Valley State College became Utah Valley University.

Longtime readers will recall that when I lived in Utah Valley (i.e., the Provo/Orem area) and worked for a newspaper there, UVSC was one of my favorite things to make fun of. In fact, it was a favorite thing for many people in that region to make fun of. I wrote several “Snide Remarks” columns for the sole purpose of mocking UVSC, and mocked it in passing in several others. (Search for “UVSC” on this site and you’ll get plenty of hits.)

Becoming a university instead of a state college doesn’t automatically mean it’s now a really awesome center of learning, of course. It may be on the right track, but it still has open enrollment, which means you can go there no matter how stupid you are. I will continue to childishly poke fun at the place regardless of what it’s called.

So why is the switch from UVSC to UVU sad for me? Because it invalidates my song “UVSC,” which was a parody of “Under the Sea” and cannot survive a change in lyrics. I’d have to write a whole new song. And if you’ve heard “UVSC” — which you can do for free here, or download it for 99 cents here — you know that it’s a thing of beauty that can never be duplicated. Not that I do a lot of shows in Provo (the only place the song is funny) anyway, but still. It’s the end of an era.

Farewell, UVSC! I shall always remember you and laugh. (At you, not with you.)