My ‘best’ film-related pieces from 2011

Here is a pile of links to some of my one-off movie columns from this year that you might find “funny” or “interesting” or “not very long.” Except as noted, all of these were for, where my editor, Laremy, is nearly always responsible for coming up with the great topic.

Jan. 10: Predicting the Marketing Slogans of 2011.
Feb. 9:
Logical Problems Presented by “Just Go with It.”
March 2:
The 10 Commandments for Getting a Film into Sundance.
April 17: Why the “Don’t Think About It!” Argument Is Dumb.
June 22:
Unsettling Questions Raised by the Alternate Reality in “Cars.”
July 13:
A Long Column About the Length of Movies.
July 27:
The Pitch Meeting for “The Smurfs.”
Aug. 30:
A Fake Report from Our Fake Set Visit.
Sept. 7:
The Pitch Meeting for “I Don’t Know How She Does It.”
Oct. 7:
A Proper Gentleman from 19th Century England Reacts to Seeing “Human Centipede 2.” []
Oct. 10: Things Nicolas Cage Could Do That Would Theoretically Still Shock Us.
Oct. 18:
The Timeline for Winning Best Picture.
Nov. 1:
The Pitch Meeting for “New Year’s Eve.”
Nov. 9:
Logical Problems with a Horse That Goes to War.
Dec. 20:
The Next 35 “Alvin and the Chipmunks” Sequel Titles.