So here’s the thing. Remember that one time when I had the Kickstarter campaign for a year of “Snide Remarks,” and the deal was that I’d do 50 columns in 52 weeks — basically every Monday, except that I’d get a couple weeks off? Well, do you know what I didn’t take into account when I made those plans? I didn’t take into account that when I’m at a film festival, I cannot accomplish any work that isn’t immediately related to the coverage of that film festival.
My plan was to have a column written before I left for Tribeca so that I wouldn’t have to work on it while I was in New York. Now, I could make some excuses for why that didn’t happen, but they all boil down to the fact that I just didn’t get it done. I just didn’t. Oh, I tried. I have some great bits assembled. So funny! But nothing resembling a coherent (even for me) “Snide Remarks.”
So I figured I could either publish something that I’m not entirely 100 percent proud of — and let’s pretend that I’ve never, ever done that before, and definitely not during a film festival — or I could own up to my mistake and plead for your mercy and not run a column this week and make it up to you later. I have chosen the latter option.
Technically, I’ve now used up both of my free weeks, and believe me, I feel dumb for using them already, like when people on “Who Wants to be a Millionaire” blow through their lifelines before they even get to the $100,000 question. You’ll still get your 50 columns, don’t worry — only 44 more to go! — even if I have to double up one week or something.
So that’s the story. I’m an idiot. Back on track next week, and then forever.
Love,
Eric
I can’t speak for anyone else, but if it takes longer than a year to get all 50 Snide Remarks written, I won’t feel cheated as long as I get to read all 50 of them eventually. I know that’s not exactly what was promised but… well, what do the rest of you guys think?
Yeah, it’s OK as long they gut published eventually.
I’m a less than 0.25% shareholder of Snide Remarks, so I’m not sure that my opinion counts for much. But I’d rather have 50 high-quality Snide Remarks over a year and a half period, than 30 high- quality and 20 so-so columns over the span of a year.
Take me miniscule shareholder vote for what it’s worth.
Dear Eric- Your column on the Huffington Post was so good that it counts twice.
The return of Snide Remarks brings me such joy that I forgive you for being that guy who bid $1 as the second-to-last Price is Right contestant. 🙂
Sounds good
Yeah, it just means we don’t have to donate to the Kickstarter thing until a few weeks later next year. Right? Right?
You remind me of what Mark Twain wrote in “Roughing It” about making a commitment to a journalistic deadline:
“Mr. Goodman went away for a week and left me the post of chief editor. It destroyed me. The first day, I wrote my “leader” in the forenoon. The second day, I had no subject and put it off till the afternoon. The third day I put it off till evening, and then copied an elaborate editorial out of the “American Cyclopedia,” that steadfast friend of the editor, all over this land. The fourth day I “fooled around” till midnight, and then fell back on the Cyclopedia again. The fifth day I cudgeled my brain till midnight, and then kept the press waiting while I penned some bitter personalities on six different people. The sixth day I labored in
anguish till far into the night and brought forth–nothing. The paper went to press without an editorial. The seventh day I resigned.”
If I were at Tribeca, I wouldn’t have spent a moment worrying about any of my loyal followers. The fact that you even thought to write us an explanation for your absence proves that you are, indeed, a grown-up.
As long as I get my snide remarks, I’m happy(:
Also agreed. I donated to the Kickstarter campaign, and I’m fine with getting 50 columns for that, no matter what the time frame is.
I agree with Nate the Great.
As long as we get our 50 awesome SRs eventually I’ll feel like I got my money’s worth.
Kudos to Eric for not wanting to half-butt it! 🙂
Everyone posting commments is awfully nice to Mr. Snider here. You are the pansiest shareholders in the world. As for me, I want my column now!
My office cubicle space is coming in on me and only Mr “Snide’s” jokes prevent me from being swallowed up completely. Give me a single joke to appease me, Snider, or the streets will flow with blood!
I donated to the campaign, and my feeling is that I’d rather get the 50 columns you feel good about in a year and half, say, than doubled up on weeks and a handful of less good columns in order to do them all in a year.
I want my money back!!!!! Oh wait…I didnt donate any…..nevertheless “GOOD DAY SIR!”….. I said “GOOD DAY!”
Is this a bad time to ask when the Water For Elephants review is coming?
I for one would gladly accept film-festival commentary as the occasional Snide Remarks.
“Is this a bad time to ask when the Water For Elephants review is coming?”
No worse than the time my grandfather died you and asked when I was going to review “Soul Men.” https://www.ericdsnider.com/blog/2008/11/07/friday-movie-roundup-nov-7/
50 great snide remarks and take the reasonable amount of time you need.
Oh wow- that was a bad time. I definitely don’t feel bad about asking you this time!
In my defense I wasn’t going to ask……….but you said “Now then. Back to work”
Is it just me, or is Rob D. kind of a *****?
For the record, I’m ok with seeing a mostly-weekly SR. That is, every week unless it becomes grossly unrealistic, like in the movie festival scenario, or a family emergency, or something. And if it takes more than 52 weeks to get through them…meh. I’m all about the quality humor, and masterpieces take time. 🙂
And Grandpa was all about getting back to work!
I don’t know Katy………I just enjoy reading Eric’s reviews of new releases. It helps me decide if should go see the movie. I’m not sure if I deserve a 5 star rating (thanks though!)
Settle down Katy…no need for name calling
I’d settle for a song…a NY Broadway musical number on Tribeca? Since you have piano skills and all 😉
I too am good with 50 columns in a reasonable time, allowing for the occasional week off for film festivals, Thanksgiving, Christmas, Comic Con, etc. In fact, I kind of wondered about film festivals when we did the Kick Starter thing, because those are the dreaded weeks when I don’t get an EBM to brighten my Thursday.
Wait, you’re writing Snide Remarks again? And people are paying you? Wow. That’s neat. Good for them! Good for you!
Rob D! That was class*****ic!!! Ahhh….made me laugh.