Angry Letter: ‘Blair Witch 2’

I received this e-mail today from a Swiss reader who took issue with my review of “Blair Witch 2: Electric Boogaloo.” (How come the foreigners only defend movies that NO ONE liked?) I swear to you, I have not tampered with the e-mail at all: She really did spell everything the way it is here.

You are yust moping and pestering about Blair Witch 2. It wasn’t that bad. I know alot of people how found it good. [You must be yoking!] Well I can yust say You Are Boring and this site is too! Sorry but who reads your 6 page long biography about your BORING schooltime. [Well, you did, apparently.] Well I can yust imagine you beeing a little smart’rsuch a boring person and this picture of you looks so slimy and cheesy. [The way it’s supposed to.] Eric, Eric, Eric, Eric Who the hell is Eric? [Class assignment: Write a song whose first two lines are “Eric, Eric, Eric, Eric/Who the hell is Eric?”]

geetings from Lulu(switzerland)

Like all valid opinions that are definitely worth paying attention to, this one came without a last name (unless it’s “(switzerland)”) or return e-mail address. I was therefore unable to provide Lulu(switzerland) with the names of the other 1,000,000 film critics who disliked “Blair Witch 2,” so that she could write to them, too.