Some Body

In “Some Body,” Samantha (Stephanie Bennett, also co-writer) is a 20-something kindergarten teacher who breaks up with her boyfriend of seven years so she can discover who she really is. Who she really is, it turns it, is someone who is always either crying or having sex. Seriously, that’s all this movie is: Samantha crying, or Samantha having sex. I remember two moments when she was neither crying nor having sex, and in both instances, she was sitting on the toilet. If they’d had her cry and have sex simultaneously, this utterly uninteresting tale of love and sex in the ’00s could have been over in half the time. It’s only 80 minutes as it is, but man, are those 80 minutes ever dull.

The actors improvised most of their dialogue, and the film is shot to look like a documentary (i.e., it’s cheap-looking), complete with faux interviews with the characters, “Real World”-style. This set-up could easily lead to some insightful, thought-provoking commentary on relationships, but in the hands of director Henry Barrial (also the other co-writer), it’s bland and tasteless. It’s like hearing your sister-in-law whine about all the ins and outs of her tempestuous love life: Who cares?

Anthony (Jeramy Guillory), Samantha’s boyfriend, doesn’t take well to getting the axe, and he’s soon living with a new gal, Eve (Laura Katz), who is quite a bit better for him than the dominating Samantha was. Samantha is devastated that her ex wants nothing to do with her, and she hops from guy to guy and bed to bed, sowing her wild oats while it’s still springtime.

She eventually winds up with Bobby (Sean Michael Allen), a sweet guy who really adores her, and who of course she trashes.

Why we’re supposed to feel sympathetic for Samantha, I don’t know. Perhaps audience members who identify with her position will like her more, but I found her completely unlikable. There’s a solid woman-finding-herself story somewhere in here, but you’d have to dig pretty deep to uncover it.

D (; R, abundant harsh profanity, strong nudity, graphic sexuality, some drug use.)